Victoria Men's Counselling

Are men’s concerns during counselling sessions different from those of women? Research shows that men do process information differently, and that their way of relating to “emotional work” is not the same as women’s. John Gottman, renowned author and couples’ therapist, has referred to “flooding.” In his view, when men become overloaded with information, stress, and emotional responses to high energy situations, for example, a fight with their spouse, they can become flooded. In that state they are unable to process information well, or relate to the concerns their spouse is raising. There are ways to decrease the chances of this happening, and they can be learned in couples therapy, so that couples can communicate better about emotionally charged issues.

What about one-on-one, with a therapist? A therapist is trained to listen and talk to people in a particular way. Some of the jobs of a therapist are to encourage, challenge, educate, and support their clients through times of transition and growth. What kind of support do you want from your counsellor?

It’s important to know that your counsellor is licensed to perform counselling: People also look for a therapist that is trained in a certain type of therapy, that works nearby, that has been a counsellor for a long time, and/or is covered by insurance. While all of these things are important, studies show that the single most important factor is the quality of the relationship.

Talk to a few therapists on the phone first to get an idea of how comfortable you feel speaking to them. If the counsellor seems like a good fit it is likely that the two of you can do good work together.


Call Caron now at +1-250-885-1610.